Category Archives: Nonsense

Whatever next?

Millions of words must have been uttered since he got the sack. But, so far, I haven’t added to the Mourinho-maul.

But it’s time to break my silence.

The man had to go. Once again, and not for the first time, he had become bigger than the club.

Chelsea were in crisis. One point above the relegation zone is not where the Russian owner wants to be. Something had to be done.

He, the Russian, couldn’t do anything. He’s not a football man, other than through his wealth. But he could, at least, do one thing.

He could sack him.

Then he would have to employ a man the players would respect.

They wouldn’t respect him, like some aluminium smelters or oil workers would.

Will they respect a Dutchman with a funny name?

Only time, his methods and results will tell.

Meanwhile, the ego has gone, no doubt to do battle with other egos elsewhere.

Funny old game, football.

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As it were, as it were

A friend of mine has, for some time, been peppering his text messages and emails with “as it were”.

The other day, I received a text message that had at least three “as it were”s in it. So many, in fact, that I was compelled to reply: “Thanks, as it were.”

Now, I’m not sure what his own ideas are. I feel as though, by constantly saying “as it were” he’s frightened of owning any of his own expressions in case they seem prosaic to others. If so, poor him. If they’re understood, so much the better.

In any case, ‘as it were’ could just easily be ‘as it might be’, or ‘as it could/should be’, or even ‘as it ought to be’. Let alone ‘as it might not be’.

Either way, I no longer believe anything he has to say.

Say what you mean, and mean what you say. That’s my motto.

It’s a shame other people don’t live by the same code of clarity.

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To blog, or not to blog?

That is the question.

Whether ‘tis nobler on the screen to be arrogant or amusing, blithe or bellicose; to chatter or chastise, denounce or deify, entertain or elucidate; to fulminate or flatter; to be gay or garrulous, to harangue or be hilarious; to imitate or invent, be jocular or jealous; kingly or kind, laughing or lachrymose; to be mirthful or morose, neither nasty nor nice; obstreperous or oily, prattling or precise, querulous or quirky, ranting or reticent; to be sonorous or silent, threatening or timid, uxorious or unfaithful, vain or venomous, witty or wilful, x-rated or xanthic; to yatter or yowl or be zealous or zany.

Thus the lexicon of language doth make ditherers of us all and cloud our minds with fogs of indecision as enterprises of great import and endeavours of no account slip away on streams of words propelled by emboldened others compelled to comment on all the seas of troubles and cataracts of mirth that constitute our life this while.

In truth, there is no right answer.

To blog is not to live but to merely comment on life.

Not to blog is not to die, but simply remain silent while all around the noise and clamour of more raucous souls deafens the world to what may be gained by quiet reflection.

Here endeth the blog.

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